Parenting

A Letter To Myself As A First Time Mum…

The Baby Boat Diaries

Becoming a parent for the first time was so much more intense than I could ever imagine! The emotions following birth thanks to an influx of hormones, leaky boobs and a screaming baby, the rush of love that consumes you, oh and of course, the lack of sleep!

I don’t think anything could have prepared me for how I felt and how I still do feel everytime I look at that little face! Here are the top 5 things I would go back and tell myself if I could…

1. Follow your instincts… They are the most important resource you have. Don’t stress and ask everyone’s opinion. Trust yourself! Don’t worry that she won’t sleep in the Next-to-Me that is mainly serving purpose as a bedside table! Google will tell you (most of the time) that sleeping with her in your bed is unsafe (it isn’t if you do it properly!) and that you will never get her out of your bed (this one is only half true but the cuddles are amazing!)

2. It shouldn’t hurt when you feed… I spent the first four months of Aoife’s life wincing at every feed when she would nurse. My nipples were cracked and bleeding and it brought tears to my eyes. It’s amazing really that I persevered and have been feeding as long as I have! It can hurt in the beginning but it shouldn’t long-term. This is indicative of an underlying issue! If I could go back I would look into seeking support! This time luckily it has gone smoothly!

3. Don’t let the comments get to you… By this I mean “making a rod for your own back” in particular! What utter c**p. You hold your baby as much as you like and stay with her as long as you wish! It is perfectly normal to not want to leave a 4 month old overnight, that is just part of who you are and how you parent!

4. Stand your ground… She is your baby. Make the boundaries clear. I don’t think I’ll ever forget how upset I was when she got fed chocolate without me knowing when she was a baby. Don’t get me wrong she has chocolate now but I just didn’t deem it necessary to give a 6 month old chocolate.

5. Don’t be afraid… This parenting business can be hard work but ultimately as first time parents we are all learning what works for us! It just so happens that you ended up doing things slightly different than the mainstream and that is okay! Arm yourself with facts for when you meet the inevitable sceptics and all will be fine!

And of course, take as many photos as you can… part of my reasons for creating a blog was to document my time with Aoife. I have thousands of photos and love looking back on them. Capture those memories as the time goes by so quickly!

This post is an entry for BritMums #VicksBabyRub Challenge, sponsored by Vicks BabyRub. Specially designed for babies aged 6 months and over, Vicks BabyRub is available at Boots, Superdrug, Tesco, Asda, Waitrose and all good pharmacy chains. RRP £3.99.

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Published by The Baby Boat Diaries

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34 thoughts on “A Letter To Myself As A First Time Mum…”

  1. I couldn’t agree more with all of these! Especially standing your ground. They are our children and we know whats best for them and they should all listen to the rules we give them.
    Great blog! Fab writer 🙂 x

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  2. These are all so true – being a mum for the first time is one of the most overwhelming things I’ve ever done but I think you do just have to trust yourself and find your own way through it. (BTW – my mother-in-law has bought my boys so much chocolate over the last four years, starting when they were babies, and I’d say they have never seen (or eaten) about 90% of it!) #SharingTheBlogLove

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    1. I’m all about moderation, especially now the toddler is aware of chocolate! But under 1 is a big no for me! xxx

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  3. There’s so much I would tell myself. I once heard someone say that babies are wasted on first time mums, as we spend so much time worrying about them. I’m not sure about that but I’d definitely tell myself to relax more #Sharingthebloglove

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    1. I have had it a lot less this time around. I think my family have more faith in my abilities as a mother now. Although I do still get comments about making a rod for my back etc!

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  12. Yes, we have so many worries as first time parents (understandably) but we just need to trust ourselves x

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  13. You know both my babies made my nipples sore, crack and bleed but I went to so many support groups to try and help and was always told my latch was perfect and they weren’t tongue tied. Literally nothing they could suggest to help. At about 3mths both times my nipples suddenly toughened up. I think sometimes people with delicate nipple skin just need time to adjust!!!

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  14. What a great post – and some fab advice! Becoming a mum is terrifying the first (and second) time round!! xx

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  19. The early days are such a jumble, lack of sleep is the worst. I totally agree with you though, it’s so important to trust your instincts.

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  20. Love this and I could have been reading some of these from myself. We had a little group where we shared what we would tell our pregnant self and I recognise all of these. If only we really could have told ourselves. And if only we would have also listened! 😂

    Kat x

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  21. Such great advice for a first time parent to read – for me, stand your ground is the most important one because we know our children best!

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    1. Glad you enjoyed it! It is so nerve wracking becoming a parent for the first time but it is oh so amazing too! All the best lovely! xx

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